I despise glitter. I cringe at the mention of the word “moist.” I swallow bubble gum. If using a disposable cup, my coffee lid opening must line up with the seam of the paper cup. My pillow case openings must face to the outside edges of the bed. I can’t read a book without first looking at the copyright date.
Hang-ups, phobias, and generalized quirks are often more problematic when you try to keep them a secret. I have some pretty obvious ones. Those closest to me either protect me or tease me about them.
I despise glitter. Glitter is such an iconic girlie symbol. I guess I’m not a true girlie-girl, because I’ve hated glitter since I was a small child. It gets everywhere and is uncontrollable. Glitter is the herpes of the arts and craft world. I appreciate the efforts of my friend, Lori, who actually covered the front of a glittery Christmas card with clear package tape before sending. Last year, I did not appreciate my son’s Kindergarten teacher sending “glittery dream” poems home for the night before the 1stday of school. I don’t want it anywhere near me and it’s been banned from my house.
I cringe at the mention of the word “moist.” In my head I know that a word, is a word, is a word. I know it can’t hurt me. And yet…this particular word makes me physically cringe. It sounds so yucky. So gross. My ears delete whole conversations that contain this word. My little one LOVES to say the word “moist” around me…just so he can watch my reaction and laugh. A few times a year, my Facebook peeps send me the video of handsome Hollywood men pronouncing the word. It could be the weatherman, a baking show, my cutie 7 year old or a hottie actor…it doesn’t matter who says it…it’s gross.
I swallow bubble gum. If I put a piece of gum in my mouth, within a few minutes I forget that I’m chewing gum and swallow. Typically, I refuse gum.
If using a disposable cup, my coffee lid opening must line up with the seam of the paper cup. I will stand at the Starbucks pick up counter and change my lid, if necessary.
My pillow case openings must face to the outside edges of the bed. I’ve tried to let this one go. I just lay in bed obsessing about how the pillowcases are wrong, until I finally move them.
I can’t read a book without first looking at the copyright date. Seriously. Why?!?!? I blame this on my 3rd grade teacher who had us look at all the title page information before we were allowed to read.
These are just a few of the silly things that make up Emily. Silly things that I embrace about myself and I’m pretty open about them. When do the silly things become a problem?
Hang-ups, phobias, and generalized quirks become more problematic when you try to hide them.
The Bible addresses concerns about hidden sin.
“Who can discern his errors? Acquit me of hidden faults.” ~Psalm 19:12 (NIV)
“He who conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will find compassion.” ~Proverbs 28:13 (NIV)
“Have I covered my transgressions like Adam…”~Job 31:33 (NIV)
“For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in unrighteousness.” ~Romans 1:18
I’m not saying that quirky tendencies are sinful. I hope that dislike of glitter or copyright dates aren’t sinful quirks! Rather I am contending that if kept quiet, the secrets of our souls can become sinful in nature.
I have wrestled with deep-soul-secret keeping and it will wear you out. How do you turn from secrecy? How do you ensure you aren’t falling into a sin trap because of secrets?
To be continued…